Uneasy
Unrest that follows the hesitation stuck in your chest
like breaths trapped in the onslaught of asthmatic gasps for life
there is no room for capturing of revelations or deeply inhaling
so haling Marys becomes the first choice of instinct
this insight staggers in on the tail end of
pipe dreams laced with trace amounts of reality
two hits to an already unstable psyche convinces me that
prime time tv remains the only place where
relativity is relatively accessible
so bartering my gifts and talents to the highest bidder makes me marketable
my soul, once unattainable, is next in line to be strapped across the auction block
and as long as I'm content in selling my flesh
trading venues for sex
they will from time to time let me slip in some of my own unadulterated thoughts
ignorance, like shrapnel, pierces the core of my beliefs
bullet wounds to my sanity
shots to the head assasinating royalty
"assimilation
assimilation
assimilation"
they demand & they scream
and so just like I bleed the remnants of life
cyclic
periodically dripping between my fleshy thighs
The message God has given me bleeds out of the wounds
dripping and sticking around my eyes
reaching up & wiping away relics of warrior cries
fingers stained with the crusted remains of deities
songs on the wind and the wisdom of ageless men
but I can't stop the loss
and it crowds my lids making my vision blurry
Kings and Queens sing tribal songs of sorrow the more I blink
cause the more I blink, the less I see
and the, less I see the less I think
and the less I think the less I need to make a scene
and the less I need to make a scene the more money they are willing to pay me
cause they know I got mouths to feed
but if I'm anything like the degenerate bleeding out beside me
I'm blowing this first whiff of cash on anything shiny and fast
and I'll be back knocking on the door first thing in the morning
beggin them to hit me
hit me
hit me with a little somethin' more
cause at first I was inhaling
pipe dreams laced with small amounts of reality
but now I'm ready
I'm haling Marys
while they plug me into the system
like needles crossing the barriers of skin
I no longer hear the wind song or the wisdom of ageless men
Kings and Queens have been silenced
I'm injected
purposely infected
disease ridden
carrying the virus of those same men who
once told my Grandfather he was nothin'
after sellin' him 14acres of land
then forcing him to guess the number of beans in a mason jar
just to gain the right to take my Grandmother's hand
and ask for something as precious as marriage
they made spectacles out of them and made them out to be horses to a carriage
fitted with braces and weighted down with words that carried
heavy soul crushing stigmas that were unfair and unbalanced
Ignorance...infectious...deadly
Coursing through my veins making me immune to reason
I hear only my heart beating
the rhythmic call to order
finally got me to breathe without thinking
and now I'm living without dreaming
cranking out ruthless garbage without feeling
I'm yearning but not feining
learning never teaching
seeing never seeing
saying nothing REAL LOUD
dumbed down for mass pleasing
I'm restless and...
Uneasy
Unrest that follows the hesitation stuck in your chest
like breaths trapped in the onslaught of asthmatic gasps for life
there is no room for capturing of revelations or deeply inhaling
so haling Marys once again becomes the first choice of instinct
this insight staggers in on the tail end of
pipe dreams laced with trace amounts of reality
and though the revolution shies away from being televised
you can find it right before your eyes
while you're standing there blinking in sync to the chanting of your name
you've reached super star high
hidden agenda personified
successful...ly silenced
a new sheep for the spotlight...
blinking...
blinking...
every now and then wondering if
the selling of your soul
was worth getting high off your dream...
j.claude(C)2011 Phoenix
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Monday, February 07, 2011
Moving forward...
Very recently I found myself back on a familiar path...closing my eyes running my fingers across memories that resemble the bark on trees, encasing years of life that was poured into our relationship, I could still feel the essence of God residing between the cracks & spaces of our timeline...lips creasing creeping into a smile soul becoming infused with what our laughter felt like. Young dreamers who stumbled across their own Narnia & met in a place where there was no space or time, only the memories. Golden & crisp like ripe melon fresh picked & drenched in sunshine, oh the memories.
Recently I found myself playing the "what-if" game...toying with ideas as volatile as the hands holding them. Staring down the barrel of a gun. I could selfishly choose my own shortcomings or love me enough to think about the longterm. Hmmmm...Looking into my heart I saw the desperation screaming out "when is it my turn. Why.Not.Me" Easier said than swallowed. Easier thought than admitted.
Recently I found myself pausing...reading over the book of my life thus far. I see missing pages, ripped sections, portions blurred by tears that stained my eternity...time has not only been unforgiving, but has shined a stark light of truth upon my towering giants of insecurity. Because the truth is, I've never felt good enough.
Good enough.
Good enough to...to..to be the focus of someone's attn...to be liked for who I am...
Good enough to...BE. And it's amazing what happens to the human spirit when it's subjected to that kind of mental slavery. No amount of accomplishments can revive the death that comes from inner abuse. Years. Years of torture that I slept with at night...I couldn't just...BE. Then we met & I thought "he gets me"...and everything started to change.
Very recently I wandered down a familiar path... familiar but long forgotten...following the trail of footprints...leading back to times when summers were long, faith was on full throttle & spirits were innocent. Confessing to him the one thing I could never admit to myself; tears fell like rain pelting my chest seeping into the cracked barren ground housing my heart...& he spoke words that made me remember how I first felt to be young & in love. Love. "I believe in you. I support you. I love you" Nothing really romantic about it...just truth. Words tossing blows to my psyche like a heavyweight. Bringing with them feelings that force your entire being to recognize the insurmountable power of God within yourself...the beauty...the serenity...the divinity of pouring out and being poured into by a person who...get's you...ya' know?
I believe that our interactions are destined. We've grown through the seasons...apart,together, apart, together...and now we're here and who knows what's to come?? Finally opening my eyes and looking back I see that I've reached the end of our path...full of those memories...eyes lingering on the maybe's, the missed opportunities...I smile to myself knowing that they will always remain where they are because a missed opportunity was just something God never meant to be in that capacity...breathing in deep I will miss this place. I know I'll venture back one day...bring my children & show them where I found myself...where I learned to love. Love God.
Love myself.
Fingers lingering for one second longer across the memories that will forever remain a part of my journey I whisper "thank you"
One last look.
Spinning on my heels, shoulders back, destiny in sight, blinking back tears, smile brimming over from deep within,I move forward...
One foot in front of the other...I love you too.
j.claude(C)2011 Phoenix
Authenticity, Loyalty...No more gray area
"the heart is forever inexperienced..." -Henry David Thoreau
They say that in math, randomness is order. In my life, what was once order has collapsed into the random. If I were a math problem I'd be on the crux of being figured out. But this is not a math problem and I am no closer to a solution to that question which plagues me than I was when it first presented itself into my world...-ehhhh...C'est la vie *shrugs shoulders*
I've always been a very complex simpleton. When it comes to relationships, romantic and otherwise, I ask two things. Authenticity. Loyalty. That's it. People have heard me say this before and slipped off the deep end into all kinds of rhetoric and deep philosophy and such...and with a wave of my hand I pay them no attention because my method and formula is tried and true. I wish for people to approach me as their authentic selves, free of the worry of what is going through my mind. After this approach, I wish them to prove themselves loyal if asking for my friendship OR seeking me out as a partner in a relationship. When you are authentic you are truthful. You carry those fruits of the Spirit...loving, peaceable, kind hearted etc. Perfect? No, but you are settled enough in your skin that you know what you want (well...as settled as any human being can be)...and then comes the loyalty. Loyalty is a characteristic that will allow a person to act in a certain manner when it comes to those things they are loyal to. When you are loyal to yourself FIRST, you understand how to conduct yourself to keep yourself at your most authentic state at ALL times...you get what I'm saying?? You know how to draw out the artillery when needed...you know which words to use in the moments of turmoil...you know how to hurt feelings without breaking spirits...tell the truth without being spited for it...mastering the delicate craft of coming in contact with the human spirit without hindering it...handling situations so that you are not stepped upon but you remain true to the person God intended you to be. Your most authentic self. Your foundation is solid. When these qualities are in place, then interacting with another is as easy as breathing in and out. It is automatic. It is selfless and takes little effort.
Over the years, I have found that being authentic and loyal will get you everywhere and nowhere, depending on who you ask. Well, in my honest opinion (because it IS MY blog) I think it gets you everywhere...with ME at least.
I am getting to the age where I have acquired the "Fool, I don't know you" face for those who have shown themselves shaky when high winds come along. I treat those around me, how I want to be treated...and when I am wrong, I'm wrong. It's not easy for me to admit, but I do and I get over myself. *a-HEM* More people need to learn how to do that...GET OVER THEMSELVES.
Contrary to popular belief that I am a walking Jeopardy game, I don't know everything...but I DO know this much, I ain't puttin' up with the foolery from GROWN FOLK no more!!! I don't have time. You're in my life or you're not. You call me just to say hi or you don't. You only use me as your ear to vent or you're truly concerned about my well being. Either you're with me or you're not. You support me or you don't. It's black or it's white. I'm done with the gray area...and by all means if you feel I fall in your "cutoff" category, please do so with the QUICKNESS. My feelings are not beyond repair...don't get me wrong, YES, they DO matter. Like my girl Sharon (Princess) says "my feelings are all I have"...but seriously, they are not beyond repair. I'd much rather know your purpose in my life and your intentions for me then to sit around anymore wasting time "hmmmng" & "hawwing" about:
-why we're not like we used to be
-why you won't talk to me
-why we been friends for YEARS, then you get in a relationship and I ONLY hear from you when you're fighting with the sig other o_O
-why you won't hire me at your counter when I know I'm a &#%?$@ good makeup artist!!!
-why you "liked" all my profile pictures then de-friended me on FB
-why I look like the female version of you but you still can't get right[DADDY!!]
-why you don't text me back
-why you won't respond to my Yahoo messages
-why you were down for the goodies til YOUR heart got involved then played me out like one of your "back of the bus hoes"
-why you're married & still tryin' to knock it down
-why you won't RESPOND TO MY YAHOO MESSAGES!!!!
*PAUSE* Wait I said that twice...Ok...sorry...I'm yelling ::blushes:: forgive me...but you get my point. I'm getting too old. It's not worth it. I can't stop the thoughts from drifting into my world every now and then, but I can fa'sho put an end to them!!
So, in lieu of alllll of that, I'm dedicating this blog right'chea to my sanity. My peace of mind. I can't change my past, and you know what, I can't expect You (this includes all the YOU's in my mind & the You's in the minds of all those nodding in agreement while reading this & starting out on this journey with me) to change anything in my future if you are not willing.
As for me and MY HOUSE, we shall not live in the gray area any longer. The truth, though inexplicable at times, will remain steadfast. And guess what, those people in my/your/OUR lives that truly matter, even during those seriously ROUGH patches, they will remain steadfast. All else are (say it with me, on the count of three, 1-2-3) OF NO CONSEQUENCE.
Yup...no more gray area.
Like I said, I'm a very complex simpleton.
Authenticity. Loyalty. That's all I ask...two self containing characteristics that will get you everywhere and nowhere, depending upon whom you ask...
You're probably still wondering what that question was I was asking myself earlier right??
Mmmmmmm...*sighhh* yeahhhh...::gazes out window::
You know...I don't even think it matters anymore...
j.claude(C)2011 Phoenix
They say that in math, randomness is order. In my life, what was once order has collapsed into the random. If I were a math problem I'd be on the crux of being figured out. But this is not a math problem and I am no closer to a solution to that question which plagues me than I was when it first presented itself into my world...-ehhhh...C'est la vie *shrugs shoulders*
I've always been a very complex simpleton. When it comes to relationships, romantic and otherwise, I ask two things. Authenticity. Loyalty. That's it. People have heard me say this before and slipped off the deep end into all kinds of rhetoric and deep philosophy and such...and with a wave of my hand I pay them no attention because my method and formula is tried and true. I wish for people to approach me as their authentic selves, free of the worry of what is going through my mind. After this approach, I wish them to prove themselves loyal if asking for my friendship OR seeking me out as a partner in a relationship. When you are authentic you are truthful. You carry those fruits of the Spirit...loving, peaceable, kind hearted etc. Perfect? No, but you are settled enough in your skin that you know what you want (well...as settled as any human being can be)...and then comes the loyalty. Loyalty is a characteristic that will allow a person to act in a certain manner when it comes to those things they are loyal to. When you are loyal to yourself FIRST, you understand how to conduct yourself to keep yourself at your most authentic state at ALL times...you get what I'm saying?? You know how to draw out the artillery when needed...you know which words to use in the moments of turmoil...you know how to hurt feelings without breaking spirits...tell the truth without being spited for it...mastering the delicate craft of coming in contact with the human spirit without hindering it...handling situations so that you are not stepped upon but you remain true to the person God intended you to be. Your most authentic self. Your foundation is solid. When these qualities are in place, then interacting with another is as easy as breathing in and out. It is automatic. It is selfless and takes little effort.
Over the years, I have found that being authentic and loyal will get you everywhere and nowhere, depending on who you ask. Well, in my honest opinion (because it IS MY blog) I think it gets you everywhere...with ME at least.
I am getting to the age where I have acquired the "Fool, I don't know you" face for those who have shown themselves shaky when high winds come along. I treat those around me, how I want to be treated...and when I am wrong, I'm wrong. It's not easy for me to admit, but I do and I get over myself. *a-HEM* More people need to learn how to do that...GET OVER THEMSELVES.
Contrary to popular belief that I am a walking Jeopardy game, I don't know everything...but I DO know this much, I ain't puttin' up with the foolery from GROWN FOLK no more!!! I don't have time. You're in my life or you're not. You call me just to say hi or you don't. You only use me as your ear to vent or you're truly concerned about my well being. Either you're with me or you're not. You support me or you don't. It's black or it's white. I'm done with the gray area...and by all means if you feel I fall in your "cutoff" category, please do so with the QUICKNESS. My feelings are not beyond repair...don't get me wrong, YES, they DO matter. Like my girl Sharon (Princess) says "my feelings are all I have"...but seriously, they are not beyond repair. I'd much rather know your purpose in my life and your intentions for me then to sit around anymore wasting time "hmmmng" & "hawwing" about:
-why we're not like we used to be
-why you won't talk to me
-why we been friends for YEARS, then you get in a relationship and I ONLY hear from you when you're fighting with the sig other o_O
-why you won't hire me at your counter when I know I'm a &#%?$@ good makeup artist!!!
-why you "liked" all my profile pictures then de-friended me on FB
-why I look like the female version of you but you still can't get right[DADDY!!]
-why you don't text me back
-why you won't respond to my Yahoo messages
-why you were down for the goodies til YOUR heart got involved then played me out like one of your "back of the bus hoes"
-why you're married & still tryin' to knock it down
-why you won't RESPOND TO MY YAHOO MESSAGES!!!!
*PAUSE* Wait I said that twice...Ok...sorry...I'm yelling ::blushes:: forgive me...but you get my point. I'm getting too old. It's not worth it. I can't stop the thoughts from drifting into my world every now and then, but I can fa'sho put an end to them!!
So, in lieu of alllll of that, I'm dedicating this blog right'chea to my sanity. My peace of mind. I can't change my past, and you know what, I can't expect You (this includes all the YOU's in my mind & the You's in the minds of all those nodding in agreement while reading this & starting out on this journey with me) to change anything in my future if you are not willing.
As for me and MY HOUSE, we shall not live in the gray area any longer. The truth, though inexplicable at times, will remain steadfast. And guess what, those people in my/your/OUR lives that truly matter, even during those seriously ROUGH patches, they will remain steadfast. All else are (say it with me, on the count of three, 1-2-3) OF NO CONSEQUENCE.
Yup...no more gray area.
Like I said, I'm a very complex simpleton.
Authenticity. Loyalty. That's all I ask...two self containing characteristics that will get you everywhere and nowhere, depending upon whom you ask...
You're probably still wondering what that question was I was asking myself earlier right??
Mmmmmmm...*sighhh* yeahhhh...::gazes out window::
You know...I don't even think it matters anymore...
j.claude(C)2011 Phoenix
Introspectively speaking...
"As if you could kill time without injuring eternity...Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."-Henry David Thoreau
I'm realizing more and more as my breaths turn into sunrises turn into sunsets turn into days weeks months years that I need to take myself a little less seriously. I've found such solace in my goals and accomplishments, but at the same time have found reason to berate myself over my failures.
Peace has been on my list of things to acquire for quite some time now, and I've figured out how to attain and hold on to this rare treasure. The moment I stopped wondering why my failures were present in my life, and started understanding that I am a collection of every moment (failures and achievements included) in my life, I figured it out! Peace is not stumbled upon when all the bills in your life are paid, all relationships locked into place, and every day is another monumental picture in the "Who's Who in This Game We Call Life"; it is rather gathered in bits and pieces during those rough patches in our lives...when we are sailing along w/o a destination, and feeling disconnected from our purpose, peace is a decision we make to live every moment!! Not like it's our last or first, but as if it's a privilege. Our circumstances cannot define our peace, because circumstantially, everyone has to sleep at night, and its during those times when we rest that true peace can grow. Its all about conscious efforts. Decisions made inside the moment to fight for your right sleep soundly at night.
Sitting, staring at the water during Christmas Break at my Mom's house, I watched the tide roll in and out...and then it hit me. Waves, miles from shore are still connected to the peaceful lulling ripples nipping at the feet of those strolling by. No matter the position or state of action the water is in, it's all connected. You can't disconnect water from it's wave. Hmmmmm...ok, so the revelation came to me...I'm like that water...I can't be separated from my purpose, even if I tried. This bit of knowledge has completely changed my way of thinking!! I am determined to shake the fear and restlessness and anxiety and stress from my mind and heart and go CONFIDENTLY in the direction of my dreams. God is so great in his ability to reveal the semblance of Earth & Heaven stored in simple nuances of every day life.
I said ALL of that to say, I'm making the effort to see past the mountainous terrain sprawling across my life...I've been so caught up stressing that these failures and burdens and barriers were piling up and blocking me from my blessing instead of just taking a moment to chill...relax...yeah, the mountain has to be climbed but its really ok to pause & enjoy the breeze every now & then...
And besides...I have a better view of sunsets from up here...
it's the little things that make all the difference...
j.claude(C)2011 Phoenix
I'm realizing more and more as my breaths turn into sunrises turn into sunsets turn into days weeks months years that I need to take myself a little less seriously. I've found such solace in my goals and accomplishments, but at the same time have found reason to berate myself over my failures.
Peace has been on my list of things to acquire for quite some time now, and I've figured out how to attain and hold on to this rare treasure. The moment I stopped wondering why my failures were present in my life, and started understanding that I am a collection of every moment (failures and achievements included) in my life, I figured it out! Peace is not stumbled upon when all the bills in your life are paid, all relationships locked into place, and every day is another monumental picture in the "Who's Who in This Game We Call Life"; it is rather gathered in bits and pieces during those rough patches in our lives...when we are sailing along w/o a destination, and feeling disconnected from our purpose, peace is a decision we make to live every moment!! Not like it's our last or first, but as if it's a privilege. Our circumstances cannot define our peace, because circumstantially, everyone has to sleep at night, and its during those times when we rest that true peace can grow. Its all about conscious efforts. Decisions made inside the moment to fight for your right sleep soundly at night.Sitting, staring at the water during Christmas Break at my Mom's house, I watched the tide roll in and out...and then it hit me. Waves, miles from shore are still connected to the peaceful lulling ripples nipping at the feet of those strolling by. No matter the position or state of action the water is in, it's all connected. You can't disconnect water from it's wave. Hmmmmm...ok, so the revelation came to me...I'm like that water...I can't be separated from my purpose, even if I tried. This bit of knowledge has completely changed my way of thinking!! I am determined to shake the fear and restlessness and anxiety and stress from my mind and heart and go CONFIDENTLY in the direction of my dreams. God is so great in his ability to reveal the semblance of Earth & Heaven stored in simple nuances of every day life.
I said ALL of that to say, I'm making the effort to see past the mountainous terrain sprawling across my life...I've been so caught up stressing that these failures and burdens and barriers were piling up and blocking me from my blessing instead of just taking a moment to chill...relax...yeah, the mountain has to be climbed but its really ok to pause & enjoy the breeze every now & then...
And besides...I have a better view of sunsets from up here...
it's the little things that make all the difference...
j.claude(C)2011 Phoenix
Saturday, February 05, 2011
Untitled Genius (Collab)
A friend and I collabed on a piece quite randomly last year...finally got around to piecing it together & voile!! Out came a finished product
After each section that we wrote, shortened versions of our names are listed in ()
PT=PoeticTone
Ph=Phoenix
I truly was inspired & had so much fun doing this, vibing off of his energy!! I hope you all enjoy!!
Untitled Genius
Too often I have to remind myself to try to forget about you...You disturb my nerves to the point where loving you is not longer optional but a mandate function for my survival...You're my revival...Allow me to celebrate tomorrow inside the womb of your today...Tell me you're worth it...Promise me I'm not dying in vain by devoting my life to you (PT)
To not let you grow would be the evil you assume of me daily/I push you away so that your tomorrow can be the birth of something great/my heart has become a tomb where you're encased & I'm incensed that you'd do me this way/hold me captive by your confessions of grandeur/death by devotion is never a vain act of glory/but I'm not entitled to your devotion/not deserving of your glory/I wish to give you freedom/I could promise you the world then hand you a globe made of plastic, so then how much would my promises matter/to love me is to forget you/so I option for the latter of the two/I need to forget you/cause you make loving you way too easy/& I've always been told that if it's too good to be true then...(Ph)
you dont turn away but pray for the courage to stay...I cant feed you the desire to allow the demo tape of love to play but I can refuse to move out your way making us a stagnanted momument of uncertainity...By deciding to refuse the opportunity with my love is the way you hurtin me but God breathed a little deeper breath when He formualted my flesh so I got thick skin...My freedom is in you--so I'll sit in the front seat on the bus of your heart like Parks and become the rebel with a cause who ignores your flaws like Newton but fact remains...Im not moving!!!...Implanted like roots...Read the palm of my soul and follow the route less traveled... (PT)
brilliant in theory/foolish in flesh/but in flesh I stand/hope resurrected/and so we're here/face to face heart to heart root to root/shift back so I can settle make room/but don't give me too much space & let me settle for nothing less than the entangling of our fingers the merging of our moons/the meshing of our color/and since God breathed a little deeper in you/let the tips of our fingers collide &, wait, see that!?? Now He's breathing for two/every beat runs from your heart through your feet right back to me/through my heart to my lips to your ear/catching Psalms on the wind whispering those vital words to convince your diaphragm to move/MOVE/breathe again/beat again/one more time so I can feel you again/and again/and...(Ph)
Im fasciated..fixated...bound by sounds of truth...Even if they place my heart in solitary confinement, I'll still institute a method to reach out to you..You reside in the belly of my devotion so Im holdin on to each breath you breathe...Your exhale is the inhale I need...I often sleep in fear, scared to roll over, dont want to look the glimpse of heaven wrapped in satin sheet with a head full of rollers...Pearl Harbor touch, you invade my turf to shatter my earth with explosions of forever...and all I can pray is that, we get it together...we find our scale of compromise that blends us together so you dont mind bending time with me...Allow my love to be your bravery...I've signed forms approving our storm so when I fall, DNR(Do Not Resusciate), do not save me! (PT)
Poetic Tone 2010
j.claude(C)2010 Phoenix
After each section that we wrote, shortened versions of our names are listed in ()
PT=PoeticTone
Ph=Phoenix
I truly was inspired & had so much fun doing this, vibing off of his energy!! I hope you all enjoy!!
Untitled Genius
Too often I have to remind myself to try to forget about you...You disturb my nerves to the point where loving you is not longer optional but a mandate function for my survival...You're my revival...Allow me to celebrate tomorrow inside the womb of your today...Tell me you're worth it...Promise me I'm not dying in vain by devoting my life to you (PT)
To not let you grow would be the evil you assume of me daily/I push you away so that your tomorrow can be the birth of something great/my heart has become a tomb where you're encased & I'm incensed that you'd do me this way/hold me captive by your confessions of grandeur/death by devotion is never a vain act of glory/but I'm not entitled to your devotion/not deserving of your glory/I wish to give you freedom/I could promise you the world then hand you a globe made of plastic, so then how much would my promises matter/to love me is to forget you/so I option for the latter of the two/I need to forget you/cause you make loving you way too easy/& I've always been told that if it's too good to be true then...(Ph)
you dont turn away but pray for the courage to stay...I cant feed you the desire to allow the demo tape of love to play but I can refuse to move out your way making us a stagnanted momument of uncertainity...By deciding to refuse the opportunity with my love is the way you hurtin me but God breathed a little deeper breath when He formualted my flesh so I got thick skin...My freedom is in you--so I'll sit in the front seat on the bus of your heart like Parks and become the rebel with a cause who ignores your flaws like Newton but fact remains...Im not moving!!!...Implanted like roots...Read the palm of my soul and follow the route less traveled... (PT)
brilliant in theory/foolish in flesh/but in flesh I stand/hope resurrected/and so we're here/face to face heart to heart root to root/shift back so I can settle make room/but don't give me too much space & let me settle for nothing less than the entangling of our fingers the merging of our moons/the meshing of our color/and since God breathed a little deeper in you/let the tips of our fingers collide &, wait, see that!?? Now He's breathing for two/every beat runs from your heart through your feet right back to me/through my heart to my lips to your ear/catching Psalms on the wind whispering those vital words to convince your diaphragm to move/MOVE/breathe again/beat again/one more time so I can feel you again/and again/and...(Ph)
Im fasciated..fixated...bound by sounds of truth...Even if they place my heart in solitary confinement, I'll still institute a method to reach out to you..You reside in the belly of my devotion so Im holdin on to each breath you breathe...Your exhale is the inhale I need...I often sleep in fear, scared to roll over, dont want to look the glimpse of heaven wrapped in satin sheet with a head full of rollers...Pearl Harbor touch, you invade my turf to shatter my earth with explosions of forever...and all I can pray is that, we get it together...we find our scale of compromise that blends us together so you dont mind bending time with me...Allow my love to be your bravery...I've signed forms approving our storm so when I fall, DNR(Do Not Resusciate), do not save me! (PT)
Poetic Tone 2010
j.claude(C)2010 Phoenix
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